Daddy's girl.

Dear Daddy,
      Daddy did you know that you are my hero? Did you know that I think you are pretty damn perfect? Did you know that I look forward to seeing you, and you have always been a strong influence in my life? Did you know that no matter what happens to you it will not change the way I feel about you? Do you know that I am a stronger person when I notice that you have weaknesses? Did you know that no matter what, no matter where, no matter how, why, when, I will always always love you!
     The last couple of months have been really life changing for me. I have had difficult things in my life, but, not many that seem as emotionally challenging as the last few months. Dad has had some unforeseen health changes, changes that has made me realize what kind of man he is, who he truly is. He has dealt with these changes like the hero I knew he was, he just justified it to me. I have been so emotionally tired and scared for the unknown that there were days I was not sure where to turn. I had a hard role in dad's care, it was very difficult to be in the doctor and the daughter role. Did I tell him what I would do as a doctor or as a daughter? Did I tell him the medical truth or the personal truth, what my gut said or what my heart said. This was REALLY hard.
      Before now I thought that I knew my dad, but I was really mistaken. I knew daddy, I did not know dad. I did not know that there was fear in such a strong man. I did not know that he was not absolutely, positively, always SURE about things. He always was so courageous in my eyes.  He always seemed so confident and sure of himself. It was so devastating to see him not so sure. It was devastating to see him sad and depressed as he was not able to work at the shop. Hard to see him have to slow down.    
     Through all of this dad did not surprise me, I knew he would likely get better. While in the ICU,there was never a thought in my mind that he would not be in and then out soon. Dad has lots more time to recover, he is improving leaps and bounds, and is back to working. I know that many changes are going to take place in his life and he will have challenges, but I know that he will do it. I want him more than ever to know that he is my hero. I want him to know that I worry and pray for him daily. I want him to know that I NEED him in my life. I need him to help me, I need him to guide me and most of all I need him to love me.  Thanks for all of the lessons daddy!

I love you,

Jody